How to Go From a Platonic Relationship to Dating

The subject of how to go from a platonic relationship to dating is one that many people think of but few could successfully experience. Platonic relationships are incredible when they work well - a non-judgmental friend of the opposite sex can offer you much in the way of advice, support, conversation, and differing perspectives.

Purely platonic relationships are definitely possible, but the rules make them a formidable challenge for most human beings. As with any couple pursuing either a heterosexual or homosexual relationship, there are many things to consider in the course of building a relationship. There is always the trust factor as well as fidelity and the impact on the relationship when either of these are threatened...or lost.

However, in the case of a platonic relationship the energy that builds under the weight of day to day life in this type of relationship is fundamentally different from the dynamics one would routinely consider necessary for the relationship to thrive.

Let's take a look at some of the components of this type of relationship that would be diametrically opposed to the longevity of a relationship that follows the so-called "societal norms" that are generally accepted by relationship partners.

1. Each individual in the relationship is free to be totally candid which enhances the partner's ability to understand the opposite sex. This dynamic often includes the most personal idiosyncrasies that relationship partners normally hide from each other.

2. Each individual in the relationship makes a sincere commitment to keeping the relationship on a lovingly respectful and non-sexual basis. This is the most commonly accepted foundation for any platonic relationship. Once sex enters the picture the bond is broken or irrevocably altered.

3. It is not unusual for couples in this type of relationship to actually grow to fear breaking of any established boundaries for the relationship, even those that are not sexual in nature. Most likely this is because of a subconscious fear that any weakening or bypassing of boundaries could undermine the security of their friendship.

4. Both relationship partners value their friendship with a selfless dedication to preserving and protecting their status as best friends. It is the unusually solid nature of this friendship bond that can provide the fuel that leads to a relationship that lasts a lifetime.

Now that some of the basic acceptances of a relationship have been established, we revisit the question, "how to go from a platonic relationship to dating" for a very simple, and yet complex formula for shifting gears. And understand the process, while challenging, tends to have willing participants.

The simplest, albeit clumsy and somewhat embarrassing process for the relationship partners, begins with making the first moves toward a sexual relationship. It is easy to imagine the mixed emotions of two people who have respected each other's commitment for what could have been several years. Now they are faced with the challenge of establishing an entirely new set of rules, not to mention revealing another side of them for the first time.

Now they must:

a) Confess and totally explain their true feelings for each other...

b) It is time for them to admit and or share any moments during their relationship when their platonic feelings began to awaken and this challenge nearly wrecked their friendship...

c) Each partner must agree to make a new commitment, however this time it is to each other at a much deeper level, both emotionally and physically.

d) As unimaginable as it sounds the couple must now "schedule" their sexual breaking of the fast. After all, this natural behavior between a man and a woman will be emotionally, and possibly physically uncomfortable for this couple, especially if their platonic relationship lasted more than a couple of years.

All in all, it is very likely this relationship will be on solid ground, especially in comparison to "normal" relationships that miss the point of a relationship's best foundation, namely that friendship is fundamental!

Once couples learn that establishing a committed friendship as the basis of their relationship is actually the first order of business before moving forward, relationships will move into a totally different zip code from those of the world we live in today.